OTR Lagniappe Shorts - Gone Fishing (Baby Snooks) - video Dailymotion

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The Baby Snooks Show was an American radio program starring comedian and Ziegfeld Follies alumna Fanny Brice as a mischievous young girl who was 40 years younger than the actress who played her when she first went on the air.

Transcript

00:00And now, ladies and gentlemen, here's Fanny Bryce as Baby Snooks.

00:11Well, Daddy, played by Hanley Stafford, is all set for a swell outing.

00:14He has an appointment to go fishing with some friends.

00:17And as our scene opens, it is 4.30 in the morning and he's about to leave the house.

00:21Listen.

00:22Well, I guess I have everything.

00:25Tacklebox, rods, net, thermos.

00:27Uh-oh.

00:28Mustn't forget my waiting boots.

00:30Well, now I've got to sneak past the kids' room and...

00:34Come on, Daddy!

00:36Oh, what's the use of saying prayers?

00:39Where are you going, Daddy?

00:41I'm going fishing.

00:42You want to make something out of it?

00:44Uh-huh.

00:44Now, look out.

00:45I've got to hurry.

00:46Why?

00:47Now, Snooks, I'm not going to stand here and argue with you.

00:50It's 4.30 in the morning and everybody in his right mind is sleeping.

00:55Funny, isn't it?

00:56I suppose you think I'm crazy because I get up so early to go fishing, don't you?

01:00No, Daddy.

01:02Oh.

01:02Well, I'm glad to hear you say that.

01:05Your mother doesn't seem to understand my little hobbies.

01:07What hobbies?

01:09Oh, a hobby is something that a man takes up outside of his regular work.

01:12Something that relaxes him.

01:14Some people collect stamps.

01:16Others do woodwork.

01:17Does Uncle Louie make a hobby?

01:19Yes, Uncle Louie etches.

01:21Huh?

01:22I said your Uncle Louie spends his spare time etching.

01:25Why don't he scratch himself?

01:28Well, I'll explain it to you some other time.

01:30Now, let me go and I'll bring you back a fishing.

01:32How do you know you will?

01:34How do I know?

01:35Uh-huh.

01:35Ah, I'm just about the best fisherman in the world, that's all.

01:38Remember last time I went?

01:40I brought home a sack full.

01:41And Mommy wouldn't let you bring them in my house.

01:44Ah, don't remind me of it.

01:46And such beautiful fish, too.

01:49Oh, I had three barracuda and one smelt.

01:52They all smelt.

01:54It is not.

01:56You're getting more like your mother every day.

01:58What's in that little pen, Daddy?

02:01Worms.

02:01I want to see them.

02:02Well, I haven't got time.

02:03Oh, please, Snooks, it'll be soon too late to go fishing.

02:06How is fish he's born, Daddy?

02:08Well, the fish lay eggs.

02:10Like a chicken?

02:11No.

02:11A chicken only lays one egg at a time, but a fish lays hundreds of eggs.

02:15Why?

02:16Oh, I don't know.

02:17Let me get out of here.

02:19Don't fish tackle when they lay eggs?

02:21No.

02:22Only a hen cackles.

02:24The hen lays the egg, then she sits on it.

02:26Did anybody sit on me?

02:29No.

02:30But it would have been a good idea.

02:35Oh, Snooks, I'll be late for my fishing appointment if you keep asking me questions.

02:39How are you going to catch the fish, Daddy?

02:41With a hook.

02:42You tie a hook on your line and let it go to the bottom.

02:44Why does it go to the bottom?

02:46Because I take along a big sinker.

02:48Is Uncle Louie going?

02:50No, Uncle Louie is not going.

02:52You said he was.

02:53I didn't say anything about Uncle Louie.

02:55I said I'd take along a big sinker.

02:57Oh, I thought you said...

02:59Never mind that.

03:02My dear.

03:04That's no way to talk about your Uncle Louie.

03:07You always say it, Daddy.

03:09Well, I know him better than you do.

03:13Besides, I have no time to discuss it with you now.

03:15Goodbye.

03:16Bye.

03:17Oh, now what is it?

03:19How are you going to catch the fishies?

03:21I told you, with a hook.

03:23You tie a hook to your line, then you bait the hook and drop it in the water.

03:26And pretty soon you feel a bite.

03:28Then you know what you do?

03:30Uh-huh.

03:31What?

03:31I don't know.

03:34Well, you set your hook.

03:36Like this.

03:37Then you start to reel him in.

03:39Careful.

03:40Keep his head up.

03:41See him?

03:42Uh-huh.

03:43Look at him whiz.

03:44Now, don't give him any slack.

03:46Reel him fast.

03:47Bring him right to the surface.

03:49Ha-ha.

03:49There he is.

03:51Look at that fish.

03:53What a beauty.

03:55You feel all right, Daddy?

03:57I feel fine.

03:58And it's getting late.

03:59I got to go.

03:59I want to go with you.

04:01Now, don't you start that.

04:02And I won't start any more nonsense.

04:03You don't attack me out.

04:04You'll what?

04:06I'll eat up all your worms.

04:09Snooks, now put that can down.

04:10Oh, what am I going to do with you?

04:12Don't attack me with you, Daddy.

04:13No.

04:14This is one time you're not going to bully me into giving in.

04:17Now, go ahead and eat the worm.

04:18See if I care.

04:19Now, tell me your story and I'll let you go.

04:21Oh.

04:22All right, but a quick one.

04:24Did you ever hear the story about the 12 apples and only 10 were good?

04:27No.

04:27Too bad.

04:28Goodbye.

04:30Oh, yeah, yeah.

04:32It was too short.

04:34Tell me a story about some fish.

04:37Oh, no.

04:38Well, look, I know a joke about fishing.

04:41You want to hear it?

04:42Uh-huh.

04:42And will you promise to let me go if I tell you?

04:44Uh-huh.

04:44Okay, but no interruptions.

04:46There were once two Irishmen named Pat and Mike.

04:49One day, they rented a boat and went out fishing.

04:51Who rented a boat?

04:52Pat and Mike.

04:53Well, they found a good spot in the middle of the lake.

04:56They caught a lot of fish.

04:57And Mike wanted to remember where they caught them.

04:59So he said to Pat,

05:00Be jay, but Pat,

05:01it is thinking I am that we'd better be coming back here tomorrow.

05:04Ha-ha.

05:05Ha-ha.

05:06Why, what are you laughing at?

05:07Ha-ha.

05:08That's a funny joke, Daddy.

05:10Tell me another one.

05:11I haven't finished this one yet.

05:13Ah.

05:14Well, anyway, Mike wanted to remember where he caught the fish

05:17so they could come back the next day.

05:19And what do you think the darn fool did?

05:21I know.

05:22He made a mark on the side of the boat.

05:23Ha-ha-ha.

05:24Ha-ha-ha.

05:25Ha-ha-ha.

05:26Ha-ha-ha.

05:27Ha-ha-ha.

05:28Ha-ha-ha.

05:28Isn't that the silliest thing you ever heard?

05:30Yeah, sure.

05:32How did he know he'd get the same boat?

05:37Now, you get the joke, all right.

05:39I can see that.

05:40Ain't I smart, Daddy?

05:41Oh, sure.

05:42I'll give you a medal when I come home.

05:43So I...

05:44Daddy.

05:45Oh, what is it?

05:47I want a pair of rubber boots like yours.

05:49No, you can't have rubber boots.

05:51Why?

05:52I'll think of a reason later.

05:54Goodbye.

05:54Ha-ha-ha.

05:55Oh, Joe, please.

05:57Come buy me some rubber boots.

05:59Now, you listen.

06:01I'll tell you a very sad story about a little girl who wanted rubber boots.

06:04And she cried till she got them.

06:06Would they fit me?

06:08Yes.

06:09And one day, there came a great big rain.

06:11And the silly little girl put on the rubber boots and went wading in the deepest puddle

06:15she could find.

06:17So her feet got all wet.

06:19And that night, she contracted a bad cold.

06:21Well, the cold got worse.

06:24And in two days, she had pneumonia.

06:27Mm-hmm.

06:28So her father called in the biggest doctors.

06:30But none of them could save his child.

06:32The crisis came.

06:34And just at the stroke of midnight, the poor little girl died.

06:38Her broken-hearted father buried her in a little grave.

06:41Right on the top of a green hill.

06:44And every year, he puts a flower on it.

06:47Now, doesn't that make you stop and think?

06:49Mm-hmm.

06:50What are you thinking about?

06:51What did they do with the boots, Daddy?

06:54Ah, goodbye.

06:55Goodbye.

06:56Goodbye.

06:56Ha, ha, ha.

06:57Ha, ha, ha.

06:58Ha, ha, ha, ha.

06:59Ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:00Ha, ha, ha.

07:01Ha, ha, ha.

07:02Ha, ha, ha.

07:02Ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:03Ha, ha, ha.

07:04Ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:05Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:06Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

OTR Lagniappe Shorts - Gone Fishing (Baby Snooks)

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