Parliament’s Original “Funny Guy”

Brut India

If there was ever a politician who could crack a joke, it’s Lalu Prasad Yadav. And this is his stand-up set.

Transcript

00:0050 crores, 50 crores, 70 crores, 90 crores, how much do you want?

00:07The mind is a woman, the heart is black.

00:13Everyone is saying that we have done a great job.

00:16We have given crores of profit to every farmer.

00:19Now the fruit will bear fruit for years.

00:21I will try to translate myself in English.

00:33Everybody is appreciating that I have done a tremendous work.

01:00Each and every year, I have earned crores and crores.

01:05Every day.

01:07And they are saying, Lalu Yadav has planted a fruit tree.

01:15And every year, it is duty of mine to grow fruit tree.

01:27After this, there will be no problem of rail cars.

01:37There were so many people, everyone had an S on their cheeks.

01:41Everyone was crying.

01:43What do you call a ticket?

01:45A car, a broken car, a tattoo.

01:49I don't know, a tattoo.

01:51Now, Dada was saying that it is Valentine's Day.

01:55Valentine's Day?

01:57What is Valentine's Day here?

02:01This is a situation of a reporter.

02:03Reporter?

02:05What are you saying?

02:07What did you write?

02:09Read it.

02:11You have read it.

02:13I am reading.

02:15Listen carefully.

02:17I am reading the relevant part.

02:19Talwad, Jaswant, visibly taken aback.

02:25Sunday, Bhim insisted that Vajpayee had made an irate civil decision.

02:37A decision that cannot be reversed.

02:42Vajpayee has taken it.

02:44Vajpayee has detained Annaji.

02:46Vajpayee has filed detention.

02:48Before taking Annaji, he was taken to the police line.

02:52After the police line, he was taken to Tihar jail.

02:57At least, they should have asked us.

03:00They should have asked Advani ji.

03:04Advani ji was arrested.

03:07He was given respect.

03:09He was given a massage.

03:11He was kept in a house in Kolkata.

03:13And he was sent by helicopter.

03:16So I said,

03:18And I kept talking over the telephone.

03:22Sir, if there is any problem, please let me know.

03:25If there is any trouble, please let me know.

03:28You will get food, Mr. Gupta.

03:30Don't talk about revolution.

03:34Bhāsan kand se bolte bolte aapne bāl pakā dīyā.

03:41Ākhiyā bolte package dīyā, package dīyā.

03:47Kyā bole se?

03:50Aiyo meno, aiyo meno, bijli āyī, bijli milī, milī.

04:03Arey, Modi ji, theekse bolo, nahi toh naas phat jayega aiyo.

04:09Aisa koi pardhan balti dekha kya?

04:13Kya baat hai?

04:16Pachās, parod, pachās parod, satar karod, navey parod, kitna jaye?

04:23Ab vidyāthi parshat ka nārgār āghe bhaj gaye, Modi, Modi, Modi.

04:30Media ke log bhi dekho bhāi, yeh desh rahega, sanstha rahega, tā aapkā bhi radio chalega.

04:37Aapkā news toh patāye.

04:39Some news toh hum hi log dete hai.

04:42We are creator of news.

04:45Aur hum log kohi gāi.

04:47Diwaane ho, gāi de rahe ho.

04:49Patāye.

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