Timothee Chalamet : SNL monologue 2025

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Transcript

00:00Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for being here. I'm honored to be back.

00:04This is my third time hosting Saturday Night Live, but it's my first time hosting it

00:11with a little stache and a little goatee. Let's get a little close up on that, yeah?

00:15All right. Yeah. Yeah, get closer. That's 37 hairs right there. I'm literally gonna be 30

00:22years old next year. Okay. But seriously, this is a historic episode because it's

00:26the first time an actor has also been the musical guest at Saturday Night Live, and if you're

00:31wondering if that's true, it's not. That's a distinction I share with the great Gary Busey.

00:42Tonight, I'll be playing songs by Bob Dylan, and I will say...

00:49I will say it was a little weird playing Bob Dylan right after I played Willy Wonka,

00:53but I actually discovered that the two men have a lot in common. They're both eccentric,

00:59they're both innovators, and they both captured and enslaved hundreds of Oompa Loompas.

01:06Okay. A complete unknown just got eight Academy Award nominations.

01:15Thank you. And I'm truly overjoyed. I was literally crying in my dressing room here

01:20when I found out the entire creative team worked extremely hard bringing to life the

01:24brilliant artist Bob Dylan, a man whose music and career has become a guiding light to me.

01:29And it's an enormous honor going to these award shows. It's such a great experience,

01:34but I just keep losing. And each time, it gets harder to pretend it doesn't sting.

01:43Let's take a look. And the winner is Gary Oldman.

01:48Gary Oldman for The Darkest Hour.

01:52Gary Oldman.

01:54Mahershala Ali for Green Book.

01:57Mahershala Ali.

02:03Man, just another lonely night with my Dune popcorn bucket.

02:10But the most embarrassing part is I've had this sad little speech in my pocket for four years

02:15that I've never gotten a chance to read. So I was thinking maybe tonight I could

02:19read it for everyone here. Is that possible? Okay. So why don't we, everyone here, just

02:26pretend like we're at an award show. And can I just, can I give you this envelope and

02:31just say the award goes to, and then you read it. Okay. Let's get into it. Okay.

02:36And the award goes to Kenan Thompson.

02:57Thank you very much. Wow. Oh man. Chloe Fireman. Thank you so much. I didn't expect this.

03:07To my fellow nominees, you did beautiful work this year.

03:16Anyway, I love Bob Dylan. This is for you, Bob. We got a great show for y'all tonight.

03:24Come on, man. Can I do that part, please? I'm never here, man. Can I do it?

03:27Oh yeah, yeah. Go ahead.

03:30Little bitch.

03:30All right.

03:35I just want to say I'm really excited for tonight. You might not know the Bob Dylan

03:39songs I'm performing, but they're my personal favorites. And I'm so grateful Saturday Night

03:43Live is still doing weird stuff like this 50 years in. They're either really nice,

03:49they're either really nice for letting me do this or incredibly mean, and this is all a big prank.

03:54I sincerely can't tell. We'll find out. We got a great show for you tonight. Come on.