Sara Ali Khan’s love for food and films

Brut India

“I started feeling the need to apologise for who I am.” Sara Ali Khan opened up about the change she saw in herself after doing a couple of films.  📹: BeerBiceps.

Transcript

00:00Overweight. I broke the weighing scale.

00:02What am I saying about overweight people? That's wrong, actually.

00:05What did you eat in order to become 96 kg?

00:08Just pizzas.

00:10Pizzas, burgers, triple chop.

00:30When I was studying in school, when I went to Columbia College, just generally I feel

00:42I was very unapologetically who I am.

00:45And even at the beginning of my career, when I was doing Kedar Nath, when I was doing Simba,

00:50I was very unapologetically who I am.

00:53And then maybe like after like a love aaj kal and a coolie happened, maybe suddenly I

00:58had reasons to apologize.

01:00And I took them very seriously.

01:02And suddenly I became just a little bit too aware and just a little too, you know, self-conscious

01:08in like a certain way.

01:10And I started feeling the need to apologize for who I am, which is not the way I want

01:16to be.

01:17Why did you feel a need to apologize?

01:19I don't really even know.

01:21Because I think that whether it's good films, bad films, part of being an actor is self-exploration,

01:27right?

01:28Like what do we do?

01:29We express ourselves, we emote, we go through different situations fictitiously.

01:35And we, in doing that, understand ourselves better, both on the deeper level of like,

01:41oh, if, you know, Rinku had to feel this, I as Sara have to feel that a little bit so

01:45that I can do justice to Anandji's set.

01:47That's one way.

01:48But also as actual human beings, we're put into high pressure situations, we see highs,

01:53we see lows, we see fame, we see scrutiny, all of that kind of changes you.

02:00It takes a toll on you.

02:01It gives you strength.

02:03So many different things happen.

02:05But ultimately, the point I'm trying to make is we should be allowed, we should allow ourselves

02:12to make mistakes.

02:13And I have made them in the past.

02:16Like what?

02:17Like my performance in Love Aaj Kal was really horrible.

02:23I was not convincing in Coolie.

02:27And I think that I am aware of that.

02:30I am aware of the fact that it's also an expectation game.

02:35After Kedarnath and Simba, me, my mother, my brother, audiences, everybody had a certain

02:40expectation because I was decent in these films.

02:43I did come out suddenly and it was like, oh my God, Sara.

02:46And then I gave you two back to back films where you're like, really, Sara?

02:51Being an actor is such a huge part of who I am, but it's not just who I am.

02:54It's up to you to be surrounded by people that keep you real.

02:58Like Ibrahim will come home and call me fatty no matter what.

03:01Even if I've just shot like Chaka Chak and you can see abs, like everybody can see them

03:05man.

03:06Come on, I was starving.

03:07I was literally fainting.

03:08Like don't call me fatty.

03:09And he's like, you will always be fatty.

03:11I'm like, fine.

03:12Might as well eat them.

03:14So, you know, yeah.

03:16I grew up overweight as well.

03:18Right.

03:19I wasn't overweight.

03:20I broke the weighing scale.

03:22There's a difference.

03:24There's a little fat kid inside me who still would die.

03:28It doesn't go on.

03:29Yeah.

03:30I would die to eat pizza even like today.

03:31I would die to like eat the same way I did.

03:33100% me too.

03:34And that fat complex is in the brain.

03:36Yeah.

03:37Forever.

03:38I think.

03:39Stays a little bit.

03:40Even I get a little conscious on camera just about that one thing.

03:42No, I get like, I told our DOP three times to take the camera higher because I just didn't

03:47want to be shot from here.

03:48When you wake up in the morning and you're like 85 kgs and nothing really fits, you're

03:52like 85 to 96.

03:54Like, what difference does it really make?

03:56Which is the worst way to be.

03:58And that's what started happening to me.

03:59Because I was in college and I was already fat.

04:02And I was like, so now fatter means what?

04:05Like fat is fat.

04:07So then let me just eat the brownie.

04:09Buy the brownie.

04:10Let me eat all the brownies.

04:12That started happening, which is something that like, obviously, like maybe with weight

04:16one has learned to control a little bit.

04:19Even though I do have problems with weight, I have problems with weight till now.

04:22Really?

04:23Yes.

04:24In Jan, I was overweight again.

04:26I was told to lose weight.

04:28Yeah.

04:29My thighs became chunky.

04:30My face became big.

04:31That does happen.

04:32I really have to be extremely mindful of what I'm eating.

04:35Go to Qatar with Ananya and you don't want to see her again for a month.

04:40Like we had pizza for lunch and sushi for dinner.

04:42I'm really like not forgiving her.

04:44She ordered the dessert and didn't eat it.

04:46I finished it.

04:47Hate her a little bit.

04:48Whatever.

04:49Maybe it was planned, sir.

04:50No, no, no, no, no.

04:53But, you know, it's important to keep staying on track with weight for me.

05:00Very important.

05:01Okay.

05:02Yeah.

05:03What got into you at that point in order to lose weight?

05:06Karan Johar.

05:07Really?

05:08He came home and said, I want to offer you a film.

05:11But you need to like lose one third of you if I'm being polite,

05:15half if I'm being accurate.

05:16And I said, okay, fine, I'll try.

05:18How much weight did you lose if you're okay?

05:2045 kgs plus.

05:21I was 96.

05:23And when I shot Sweetheart and Chaka Chak, I was 53, 54.

05:29That's like the weight.

05:30Right now I'm about 57.

05:34I'll be 56 by the time I'm on my set in a week.

05:3756 is okay to shoot 54 for songs.

05:39Damn.

05:40Okay.

05:41Yeah.

05:42What did you eat in order to become 96 kgs?

05:45Just pizzas, burgers, triple chocolate.

05:49You know, like today, if you told me I can have three triple chocolate chip brownies for breakfast,

05:54I would remember every bite.

05:56I don't even remember.

05:57I just inhale them like popcorn.

05:59Yeah.

06:00I know exactly what you mean.

06:02Motivation is required, though, for me.

06:04I'm somebody that works very hard on motivation.

06:06So when there's an end goal in mind, almost nothing is impossible.

06:09How do you motivate yourself, actually?

06:14By realizing also, you know, like I was huge, man.

06:17Like it was not healthy on any level.

06:20It was hormonally affecting me, which still happens.

06:23Every time I overeat, this and the other, whenever I'm touching that 60 kg mark,

06:27you can start seeing that I'm not feeling okay.

06:29Because this is a very real conversation.

06:32I'm going to tell you that out of everything you've said,

06:34this is the one thing that can get you into trouble.

06:36Because right now, the internet is sensitive about even this.

06:38But it's okay.

06:40What's the thing?

06:43Oh, how could she say this about overweight people?

06:45But I think when you're overweight yourself, you have a ticket.

06:48What am I saying about overweight people?

06:50That's wrong, actually.

06:51Like, I'm just saying that if you eat rubbish,

06:54it's going to affect your mental health also.

06:57Because you're going to look in the mirror and be like, why am I doing this?

07:00And your hormones are going to go through the roof.

07:03I think that it's very important for overweight people to hear this.

07:06It's very important for overweight people.

07:08And nobody's saying that you need to be 54 kgs to shoot songs.

07:11Because maybe you don't have to shoot songs.

07:13But you definitely should keep check on what you're eating.

07:16Because it affects more than just your visual appearance.

07:19It affects your hormone balance.

07:21And that's extremely important.

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