Very Bad Dads

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00:00So today is the day I'm finally meeting the father of my step kids.

00:04Am I nervous?

00:05Pepe, you know kids. They know who's been there.

00:14I hope that's not him.

00:15Hey, you dusty?

00:16Nope.

00:18What? Are you sure?

00:21Where have you been?

00:22My ex-husband's here.

00:23What's he doing inside there?

00:24He's giving the kids all kinds of starbursts.

00:26Damn it!

00:27Sorry.

00:28I'm a hot habanero pepper right now.

00:31Hey, want some more starbursts?

00:34So you are dusty.

00:39Bring it in, big guns.

00:40I already met you. At the airport.

00:42No, I don't recall that, friend.

00:43Did you see dad's motorcycle?

00:45He ride? Yeah.

00:46Really?

00:47I don't know if that's a good idea, Brad.

00:49Look, he's a lot of bike, man.

00:50Why don't you go back in and take that shower so you can get a shirt on?

00:54Watch out! Watch out! Watch out!

00:57Did Brad just die?

00:58Well, I think we all need to prepare ourselves for that possibility, pumpkin, okay?

01:02If this guy was my wife's ex, I'd put a bullet in my skull.

01:05So the king raised his mighty sword.

01:07And he rained steel down upon the stepking.

01:09But the stepking blocked it with his shield.

01:11The stepking was very upset because when the real king pulled out his sword, it was long and shiny.

01:16All the maidens in the land preferred the more average-sized stepking's sword because it knew how to listen.

01:24Looks like we got ourselves a good old-fashioned dad-off.

01:26You can eat my dust, dusty.

01:29Christmas already?

01:30It's not. It's the middle of April.

01:32What's this? Playoff tickets against the Los Angeles Lakers?

01:37Not bad.

01:39Brad, you're the coolest!

01:41Dustin Mayron!

01:42Hey, hey, this is my family.

01:43Well, come on down. You guys can sit with your team.

01:45You hear that? You want to meet Kobe?

01:46Can I get five beers?

01:50This one's for Dylan and Megan and Sarah and Dylan and nothing like that.

01:58Dylan and Megan, this is for you.

02:00Okay, who's got next?

02:01I do.

02:02Honey, no. Come down.

02:04That's good of her.

02:05Godspeed.

02:10Clear!

02:13There's a zombie!

02:16Oh!

02:18Did you just punch me in the face, Brad?

02:19Oh, yes.

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