Sakshi Sindwani’s fight against body shaming

Brut India

“We’re constantly conscious about our bodies.” Fashion blogger Sakshi Sindwani talked about how women always feel pressured to meet unrealistic beauty standards and how that affects their self-worth.   : SheThePeople

Transcript

00:00When we were just like, what, 16 years old, we were slut-shamed.

00:04Punjabi families are obsessed with talking about weight.

00:07I don't know why women feel like they're insufficient if they have brains and not the beauty.

00:12We feel that men have so many women to choose from.

00:18We're told that you have to be fairer, you have to be thinner or bigger,

00:24or you have to have a certain chest size and a certain butt size,

00:27but also have a smaller waist, but also have no acne at all, but have no texture at all.

00:37So let's talk about one of the things that happens for women is that whenever they get

00:43down to social media, invariably the conversation drifts towards how perfect somebody looks,

00:50or when they get together, all that they do is discuss weight.

00:55Oh my God, I hate it. I hate it in every possible way.

01:01This is something that I struggle with so much because Punjabi families are obsessed

01:04with talking about weight and talking about, oh my God, how many calories.

01:08They're going to be eating chole bhature while discussing the next intermittent fasting they're

01:12going to be going at. It's ridiculous that our families operate like that.

01:16And it took me a long time to change those conversations.

01:18Now what I slightly do, I know that I can't change everybody's mindset.

01:21I just walk out of the room, as simply as I can put it, I don't try to, I can change myself.

01:26I don't have to be in a terrible situation and listen to people's thoughts and take their energy

01:35just because I'm related to you. I would rather move myself out of the situation.

01:40Why are women obsessed with weight?

01:44It's honestly so many things. It's to do with how we've been brought up.

01:51It's to do with patriarchy. It's to do with the world, the beauty standards.

01:56It's the fact that when we were just like, what, 16 years old, we were slut shamed.

02:04So we're constantly conscious about our bodies all the time.

02:08And we think if we're not perfect, then people will not be attracted to us.

02:13And the idea of I have to have a man, otherwise my life school is not fulfilled.

02:18And I have to attract a certain energy and men, a lot of men don't feel like that.

02:23I know that some men do. I don't want to generalize it.

02:26But I don't know why women feel like they're insufficient if they have brains and not the beauty.

02:33So they constantly are fixated on the fact that

02:37I have to be the most perfect version of myself. Otherwise, I'm nothing.

02:42Women judge themselves for the eyes of men.

02:45Yeah.

02:51I think because we don't believe that we're loved and we're enough at the core of it all.

02:57And also, we're not told very much that you are enough when we're growing up.

03:01We're told that you have to be fairer, you have to be thinner or bigger,

03:07or you have to have a certain chest size and a certain butt size,

03:10but also have a smaller waist, but also have no acne at all, but have no texture at all.

03:15If you have texture, put on that powder, put on that foundation.

03:17We're constantly told to hide the flaws, show the perfect.

03:22So we almost feel like, okay, so we have no self-esteem.

03:26We have nothing to sort of count ourselves for.

03:28So we constantly feel like we have to be perfect for that.

03:32Also, we feel that men have so many women to choose from.

03:39And we have to sort of catch the eye of the person.

03:43So we find the right guy.

03:44As opposed to, can the right guy find me?

03:47Because I'm perfect.

03:49We just constantly feel like there are very less men, which is not the case at all.

03:55And we almost need to be perfect for them.

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