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Indian vs Western Parenting standupcomedy
VideoVista
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9/8/2024
Category
😹
Fun
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00:00
My husband is Danish
00:03
Which is to say there is zero overlap in our parenting techniques
00:09
Yeah, Dane's my husband's entire parenting repertoire is darling
00:15
Please be very very very happy. Here is some Lego
00:23
You know when I found out that I was going to do this gig I
00:27
immediately
00:28
Put together a message, and I pinged it out on our family
00:34
What's app group to my husband and my children?
00:37
Because that is the kind of rock-and-roll comic I am
00:41
And my son my teenage son wrote back to me at once and his message said thug life chose you brah
00:48
And
00:55
I was like oh shit. My child has joined the gang I mean
01:01
Languages is thug and brah it had two R's, but he's a terrible speller, and I was like
01:07
and
01:08
The other thing is I thought this message is not for me this idiot has sent me a message by mistake
01:14
Which is for a gang member?
01:17
What if the next message is something much worse and
01:22
That really bothered me because well this was my moment
01:26
I am going to Apollo like if I'm gonna find out you're a criminal can we do it next month?
01:32
So I wrote back to him in all caps because as a good Indian mother, I mainly shout at my children I
01:39
I
01:41
Wrote back. This is your mom and he wrote back. I know gigging like a boss
01:56
Yeah, b-a-w-s-e boss
01:59
And also, please do remember as you listen to the rest of my set this evening that I didn't choose it
02:05
But the thug life chose me
02:09
So I have kids of course you love your kids, and it's difficult to raise them small kids are very easy I find
02:16
The biggest downside of having a very small child is they are very boring
02:22
Yeah, they want to show you they love you by talking to you all the time, but everything they know you already know
02:30
I
02:38
Mean literally zero value add in any of those
02:44
But you do it anyway because they're your kids
02:46
You know and you know what people say small kids small problems big kids bigger problems
02:52
And the reason is that as your kids get older you have to discipline them properly
02:59
And I find this very stressful
03:01
Because I'm born and raised in India
03:04
So what I consider
03:07
robust healthy
03:09
high quality parental discipline
03:12
Is frowned upon in this part of the world?
03:16
That's not true. It's illegal I
03:20
Know because I have checked
03:23
And I want to have really well-behaved kids, but that is no use to me if I am in jail, so
03:31
What you guys do here and the big thing here is teach your kids about action and consequence using a multitude of techniques
03:40
So you have something called star chart. You know what star chart is yeah?
03:43
No, let me tell you sir star chart is you find something?
03:47
Vaguely not negative
03:49
That your child possibly might be able to do and then work it into the conversation and give them a star
03:55
Thank you for not kicking me in the face today. Here's a star
04:01
And
04:03
Then the other one action and consequence naughty step you've been terribly behaved kindly go relax on the staircase
04:17
And
04:19
I was like I cannot get on board with this
04:22
So what do we have from my culture that I can somehow?
04:25
Glom on to this so it makes sense to me
04:28
And then I thought of course our parents talked to us about action and consequence
04:32
But the way they do it is they implicate us from the time. We're very young in their death
04:40
This is a way to guide our behavior
04:43
Um
04:44
Let me give you an example. Let me find someone who sir. What is your name?
04:49
John John can I use your name for this okay, so John imagine?
04:53
You're four years old and your mother will say to you John. I told you to put one spoon of chocolate in the milk
04:59
Why have you put two because you want me to die?
05:05
Very effective with small children you know
05:08
It focuses them
05:11
And John your mother could be from anywhere in India, so if she was from Gujarat. She might say something like John
05:17
Bet so much more. You know what I know if you
05:20
John you put two spoons of chocolate in your milk. Why are you drinking milk drink my blood?
05:28
She's from Punjab. She would say John don't jump much by a rejected. I don't know
05:34
I'm a bit dodger John you put two spoons of chocolate in the milk fine. I am going to beat myself
05:42
To death
05:45
You please stay here and enjoy your milk
05:51
Yeah
05:52
My mom speaks Hindi so what she would probably says are a John so much cat and an hour. Oh sure out
05:57
How John why are you tinkling that teaspoon pick up the knife? You know it's what you want
06:04
And
06:08
It was working so well for me with my firstborn until when he was about seven I got a phone call from his school
06:16
And the teacher said could you and your husband please come in your son has some very specific anxieties
06:25
So I went I went I didn't take my husband my husband is Danish
06:30
Which is to say there is zero overlap in our parenting techniques
06:37
Yeah, Danes my husband's entire parenting repertoire is darling
06:42
Please be very very very happy here is some Lego
06:46
I
06:56
Went and the teacher said we don't understand
06:58
He's a great boy great kid, but every time we give him back homework, and he hasn't got full marks
07:03
He says I don't want to go home. I think my mother might be dead
07:09
And on the inside I was like yes
07:13
Good boy, he's been listening
07:17
Son but on the outside I was like what no oh
07:22
I'm so sorry. I can't imagine well. What can I say Danes are very bleak?
07:35
You've been so nice
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