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LE RÉSUMÉ PAS SURPRENANT DE KOH-LANTA !! (Vidéo exclusive Dailymotion)
INFOSMILE
Suivre
02/04/2024
Catégorie
😹
Amusant
Transcription
Afficher la transcription complète de la vidéo
00:00
[Credits]
00:04
So today we decided to talk about Koh Lanta,
00:06
you know, this famous show broadcasted on TF1,
00:09
which is celebrating its 20th anniversary this year.
00:10
A show which is named after a famous chief of Thai tribe.
00:13
That's wrong! If you want the real reason, go to Wikipedia
00:16
and stop breaking our lychees!
00:17
So the principle of this show is as simple as winning a tennis against a manchot.
00:21
About twenty candidates who wanted to prove that Robinson Crusoe was in the game
00:25
were sent to a desert island to survive there for about forty days.
00:28
With a key for the last survivor, a check of 100,000 dollars and 20 kilos less.
00:33
Which makes it an alternative to the camp diet, quite viable.
00:36
Because yes, it's not an island like Tahiti where you are welcomed with flower necklaces
00:39
while the Vahine dance around you while doing a Spanish ballet.
00:42
No, Koh Lanta doesn't pay you holidays, but rather days of suffering.
00:46
You are here to take on a multitude of challenges in order to deserve your 100,000 dollars.
00:50
In Koh Lanta, the candidates will be left alone with their fate,
00:52
with the main priority of meeting their primary needs.
00:56
Be it drinking, eating, sleeping and fucking turtles.
00:58
Knowing that the production won't give them a single loaf of bread.
01:02
Oh yes, it's jackals!
01:03
It's in a way a real return to the Stone Age, filmed by cameras at 20,000 dollars.
01:07
Behind which there will be cameramen who, on the other hand, will eat to their fill
01:10
while arguing the candidates with sausages and other turkey skewers.
01:14
While these gallerians of the Papu tribe will struggle to catch an old fish
01:18
which, despite this generous breast, will not be enough to feed a single person.
01:21
But they will split in eight to not get fired at the next council, like...
01:25
So I decided to vote against Timothée because he ate all the rice on the first day
01:28
under the pretext that he was hungry.
01:30
And I'm not hungry, we're all hungry, for fuck's sake, I'm fed up!
01:32
So Timothée, I decided to vote against you because I actually hate you!
01:36
There you go, I'm not afraid of words, so I want to clarify that I have no particular reason.
01:39
I hate you, that's all.
01:40
Timothée, the adventurers of the tribe have decided to eliminate you and their sentence is irrevocable.
01:45
Yeah, well, I don't care anyway because I also voted against myself,
01:48
you bunch of big-ass losers!
01:50
It's not you who kicked me out, it's me who got out on my own,
01:52
booyah!
01:52
No honor, no cultivation, I'm out!
01:55
Because yes, Koh Lanta is initially a team game against the yellow-reds.
01:58
Well, yes, sometimes there are blue, orange or purple,
02:01
but generally it's yellow and red.
02:02
And when you arrive on the island, whether in Papua New Guinea or the Philippines,
02:05
on a boat or in the Delta Plain,
02:07
you and your team will be equipped with two machetes for 12 people
02:10
in order to build a small local fortune camp for you.
02:13
And if you don't want to get eliminated by your teammates because their sentence is irrevocable,
02:17
you'll have to show your true colors and make yourself useful within your team.
02:20
But be careful, you have to find a balance, a kind of right environment.
02:23
Because if you're too bad, your team will kick you out right away
02:25
because you're running out of rice reserves.
02:27
And if you're too good, they'll kick you out a little later
02:29
to increase their chances of winning.
02:30
So personally, I think it's easier to create your own startup
02:33
in order to make a fortune in the local fortunes
02:35
rather than to win Koh Lanta after surviving the Cheetah Pigeon Challenge.
02:38
Because yes, in addition to being hungry and poorly housed,
02:40
which will greatly reduce your physical abilities,
02:42
you'll have to do challenges that will have a direct impact on your adventure,
02:46
starting with the comfort challenges.
02:48
So be careful, the goal won't be to sit on a massive sofa for hours.
02:52
No, these are complex and intense challenges like all the others.
02:55
Especially the Parnassus Challenge, where the goal will be to procrastinate as much as possible.
02:58
That's wrong, you'll obviously have to hang on to a rolling pin like this for hours.
03:03
But this will allow the winner to improve his/her quality of life on the island
03:06
by obtaining a pan, a flashlight or even a Tamagotchi.
03:09
But there are also and especially immunity challenges
03:12
that allow you to win, if you win them, a immunity totem
03:15
that, in addition to serving you with pretty decorations next to your fireplace,
03:18
will allow the team to escape the elimination council.
03:21
Which is quite practical in a game where the goal is not to get eliminated,
03:25
by burying the victory and the 100 000 balls that accompany it at the same time.
03:28
Even if in the end, money is more than a carrot than an objective,
03:30
surpassing yourself is the real wealth of this adventure.
03:33
It's not because it's TV that everything is tricked, I mean, I guess.
03:36
I'm not a friend with Denis Brogniart, so I don't have access to the backstage, leave me alone.
03:40
Because yes, how can we talk about Koh Lanta without mentioning the fabulous Denis Brogniart,
03:43
who became a true Internet meme thanks to his famous...
03:46
Ah, that is to say, there are people who dream all their lives to be noticed by the universe
03:50
by trying all kinds of stratagems such as leaking their own sex tape.
03:53
And the good old Denis, he made the buzz in just one syllable, which is frankly respectable.
03:57
Personally, I only know the recipe for the bad buzz in one word, and it's clearly less useful.
04:01
Especially since my little heart would not stand the pressure of being on top tweet
04:04
after repeating the word "Hitler" 5,000 times in less than a minute live on Twitch.
04:08
Finally, Denis has been presenting the show for almost 20 years now,
04:11
and during all this time, he has seen candidates more motivated than the others.
04:15
People who are laughing, people who are smiling, people who are dead too, because yes, it happened.
04:18
But in the end, every year, after weeks of struggle and survival,
04:22
the Koh Lanta adventure gives birth to a new hero, a new legend,
04:25
who will then be invited to a whole bunch of special editions,
04:28
like Koh Lanta the Legend, Koh Lanta the Revenge of Heroes,
04:31
or even Koh Lanta and the Return of the Jedi.
04:33
There you go, that was the not-so-surprising summary of Koh Lanta.
04:36
I hope you enjoyed it.
04:37
I invite you to share this video with all the adventurers apprentices you know.
04:41
And to go check out Tipeee to support us as much as possible.
04:44
With that, I go back to training for the "Poteaux les poteaux" challenge.
04:46
I'll see you next time, ciao ciao!
04:48
Hehe, that's a ridiculous ending!
04:50
Subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, subscribe, subscribe.
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