Mum Realises She Is Gay After Husband Comes Out as Transgender

Real Fix

Credit: SWNS

Transcript

00:00 Living as an LGBTQ family is freeing

00:03 because we get to live our truths.

00:05 I'm Sarah, and this is my wife, Jenny,

00:14 and I am a trans woman.

00:16 I came out after we were married for 12 years.

00:20 We have two boys.

00:22 When we first met, we were both going to college,

00:26 and we met through a mutual friend,

00:28 and I asked my mutual friend, I was like,

00:30 "Hey, who's that cute girl?

00:32 Can you kind of hook us up?"

00:33 They told me that Jenny had a boyfriend at the time.

00:36 I was like, "Oh, okay."

00:37 Three years later, that same mutual friend was like,

00:39 "Hey, by the way, that cute girl you liked

00:42 broke up with her boyfriend."

00:43 And then literally from that night-

00:45 - I moved in like two days later.

00:47 - We haven't been apart since that party.

00:49 We got married, and things happened gradually,

00:52 a little bit at a time.

00:53 I would start really early with things like,

00:55 "Hey, can I get these silk pajama pants?"

00:59 You know, that are blue, so you know,

01:01 they're still a boy color.

01:02 - 'Til eventually she started buying me clothes.

01:07 I was getting strange gifts of like pink satin tank tops

01:12 and little pleather skirts,

01:16 and I'm like, "Cool, babe, thanks."

01:19 - So I would get her those things,

01:20 and then I would be like, "Hey, can I wear that?"

01:23 - For Halloween, I think I'm gonna be-

01:26 - Anytime Jenny said yes,

01:27 I would wanna take it one step further a little bit later.

01:30 - The wardrobe became bigger,

01:32 and there were now dresses and skirts and shirts and stuff.

01:36 I remember it being well after the boys were born.

01:39 None of this was ever in front of the boys.

01:40 It was always like after they went to bed,

01:41 it was just kind of like our little secret kind of thing.

01:44 - It's like I would get depressed

01:45 having to switch back into guy clothes.

01:46 - So it was during that time that I started

01:49 Googling the word transgender and, you know,

01:51 what happens if, and during that time,

01:53 I realized, yes, I can do this.

01:55 Yes, I want to do this.

01:55 Not only that, but hey, I kind of like the prospect

01:58 of being married to a woman.

01:59 - By the time I said, "Hey, I need to talk.

02:02 I think I wanna transition,"

02:04 she had kind of already done all this other research.

02:07 - And I was like, "Well, you know, sounds good,

02:10 'cause in the meantime, I think I'm a lesbian."

02:11 - So telling the boys went really, really well,

02:14 and kids don't have a preconceived notion

02:18 of the world around them yet.

02:20 The kids don't care in general.

02:21 And they're like, "Okay."

02:23 - Daddy has a girl's brain and a boy's body,

02:26 and we're gonna work on trying to get the two to match.

02:29 - And our nine-year-old, we find him crying,

02:32 and we're like, "Morgan, what's wrong?"

02:34 And he's like, "Will Daddy still play Minecraft with me?"

02:39 And that was all he could think of.

02:42 - I mean, it's brought us closer.

02:44 - You were definitely hiding who you were,

02:45 and through Sarah hiding who she was,

02:48 I realized I was hiding who I was too.

02:50 - Not being a straight family anymore,

02:53 we really had our eyes open to the privileges that we had.

02:58 - We hold each other's hands when we're out in public.

03:00 But now, it's not as easy.

03:03 Like when one of our kids has a competition

03:04 in a really tiny town on the outskirts,

03:06 that's pretty conservative.

03:08 Like, how far apart do we need to stay?

03:10 How much can we interact?

03:13 - I don't think everybody is lucky enough

03:15 to have that moment in their life

03:16 where they really get to look in the mirror

03:20 and really ask themselves, like, "Who am I?"

03:23 I think society pressures all of us, right?

03:26 Like, "This is what you should do.

03:28 "This is who you should be.

03:29 "This is how you should act."

03:31 And I don't think many people really get a chance

03:34 to say what makes me happy.

03:36 Living as an LGBTQ family is freeing

03:40 because we get to live our truths.

03:42 (gentle music)

03:45 (soft music)

03:47 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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