Thanksgiving Turkey Attack: Turkey pardon ceremony where president pardons one farmer from slaughter

Thanksgiving is that wonderful time of year when turkeys gather with family and friends to reconnect and give thanks over a steaming hot farmer with gravy and stuffing. Everyone knows its that time of year when the cranberry sauce from the can reminds us of all those decapitated farmers in the seasonal frozen foods aisle.


But, did you know that once a year, the turkey president pardons one farmer? It’s a tradition that goes back to our founding turkeys, who recognized the noble sacrifices of farmers all over this great nation, who give their lives so that we may enjoy a nice hot plate of flannel.


So gather the chicks and pour yourself a glass of wine. It’s time to enjoy the new holiday classic, the Turkey Pardon.

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